Thank you!

Finally, for all you impatient souls over there... Little do you realise that things move a bit slower here in the cold, but here it is, the THANK YOU post!

What a lovely lumpy surprise awaited me about a week ago, lying in wait for me in front of my door. Hmm, what could it be, thought I, has some small animal taken up residence under my doormat? Has my concierge left me a present? Did I hide my pile of jewels and treasures in an inappropriate spot?

None of these! It was a nicely padded, unbent and undamaged Australia Post envelope, filled with smiling, strangely dressed people and happy memories of warm days and friends who speak the same language as me!

Little smiling chicken nuggets, mysterious and intriguing phone calls, a dog with conflicting influences, a very recognisable shadow, coat-clad muppets, happy couples (some balloons, some not), and an end to forgotten birthdays and wedding dates! But more importantly, a year-long reminder of the fact that I have some very lovely and photogenic friends on the other side of the world, whom I miss very much, and who have no shame in front of cameras!

I'm sure you'll all understand the reason for the delay in this post as you appreciate that all the way over here, the Stephen Roberts Foundation Paris Branch President was busy acting the clown in front of a well known monument to the amusement of whole bus-loads of tourists (I think someone of them took photos of me as well!)!


Thank you everyone!

Obituary

Stephen Roberts Theatre is now no more. God rest its humble green-copper-roofed soul.

A week of wet sundays

Usually the launch of a new drug means parties, new freebies, time off work and lots of expensive corporate entertainment.... Not so for poor little me....this week it meant a load of product training and stupid pointless circular arguments.

The latest, most powerful agent in Cholesterol reduction.

Well that's what we learnt this week anyway. Vytorin is a combination of ZOCOR (Simvastatin) and EZETROL (Ezetimibe). Ezetrol actually belongs to another company (Schering-plough) and due to wonderful legal documents called "joint ventures" we are co-marketing the product. This effectively means we have our hands tied by a smaller, less progressive company...hence the circular arguments.

Anyway, the end result of this weeks training is that I know a load more information that I will probably not be able to use and I really need to go out tonight for a drink. Who's coming?

I am having

such a great Friday.

I love Friday!

This weather is unbeatable!!!

STOP....Hammer Time!

MC Hammer has a Blog.

And I quote "Feel my power and yet witness my grace. I speak through the dance."

Also "There will be many steps in this dance. Learn the movements. Respect my get down."

Dumping ground

Now it's not often that I take photos in public toilets (no really) let alone blog about them but this notice I found in a mens cubicle several floors below mine at work deserves a public viewing. Those of you with a particularly sensitive nature may wish not to read on (it's really not that bad but I felt I should add some sort of disclaimer)...



I'm so tempted to ring the Facilities Helpline to report 'an incident'.

On time at last... The Wednesday Dad Joke!

Hi All,

Finally, I managed to remember to post the Wednesday Dad Joke... On a Wednesday!

This week, the challenge is to guess which SRF Member sent in the following contribution, possibly the most 'Dad' joke ever! Enjoy.

Replacing Quasimodo!

After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed. The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process. After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had decided to call it a day.

Just then, an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job. The bishop was incredulous. “You have no arms!" "No matter," said the man. "Observe!" And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon. The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo.

But suddenly, rushing forward to strike a bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window to his death in the street below. The stunned bishop rushed to his side. When he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moments before.

As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, "Bishop, who was this man?"

"I don't know his name," the bishop sadly replied "but his face rings a bell."


WAIT! WAIT! There's more…

The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist, the bishop continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame.

The first man to approach him said, "Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch that fell to his death from this very belfry yesterday. I pray that you honour his life by allowing me to replace him in this duty."

The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's brother stooped to pick up a mallet to strike the first bell, he groaned, clutched at his chest, twirled around, and died on the spot. Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side. "What has happened? Who is this man?" the first monk asked breathlessly.

"I don't know his name," sighed the distraught bishop, "but….

(Wait for it ….)

…. He's a dead ringer for his brother."

The Pink Peppercorn

Well! Ever tried Laotian cuisine? Neither had we, that was, until Saturday night. Doing our usual favourite pasttime of searching out new and fabulous eateries, we stumbled across a great little gem called the pink peppercorn. It is located on Oxford street in the centre of town and it just goes to show how lucky we are with our food in this country.

While the above picture is a bit obscure, it is of the decor in this place. They have huge photos that have been blown up to cover 3 walls, depicting everyday life in Laos. The other wall is covered in large brightly coloured squares.....Not sure why, but it makes the place seem happier and more alive.

Laotian food is obviously from Laos, and is not quite like any other cuisine I've tried. It mainly revolves around lemongrass, dill, chilli, coriander and lemon juice. I started with a divine spicy prawn and chicken dish with prawn crackers for dipping. It was half way between a dip and a (chunky) soup. So fresh and so perfectly proportioned. I followed this with a sweet/sour Lamb stir fry. Stir fry is probably a rather underwhelming description of it. The lamb was so tender you would have sworn it was slow cooked for 7 hours, and the dressing/sauce was a delicate blend of lemon, dill, chilli and crisp cucumber. The resemblance to a stir fry, I guess, begins and ends with the fact that it was tossed with greens and served with rice.

Flit had a wonderful salmon entree wrapped in banana leaves and cooked in a creamy light curry sauce. This, he followed with a prawn and chicken curry that kind of resembled a Thai green curry. The food was so fresh and the atmosphere so vibrant.

The only real criticism I would make was that the service was a bit slow, but once they got in the swing of things we couldn't keep them away (which may be another criticism, but whose counting??)

The finishing touch was the bill.....so cheap...well for the city at least. We ended up paying about $80 for the two of us which covered 2 courses and corkage. Pretty great value for such a good feed. It's also the perfect place for communal dining, so stay tuned for an invite in the next few months.

After dinner, we were walking down Oxford street and dropped into Q bar! What a blast from the past! I haven't been there since my clubbing days in early 01! We played some pool and had a drink or two and wandered out of there just as the serious clubbers were arriving. It was an amusing end to a fun night.

Guess no more....

Maybe this will help....

The Wedn.... Make that Friday Dad Joke

Hello, good evening and welcome to the Wednesday Dad Joke.

Due to some unforeseen broadcasting complications there has been a delay with the scheduled programming.
We apologise for these delays and hope to have a resumption of normal service soon.

And now for the Dad joke of the week. The SRBC (SR Broadcasting Corporation) can take no responsiblity for the quality of said joke.

A giant panda enters a restaurant.
He sits down, orders a meal, eats it, and then asks for the bill. Just as the waiter approaches, the panda jumps up, pulls out a gun, shoots the waiter, and walks out of the restaurant.
Fortunately, the waiter was only grazed by the bullet, and upon arrival of the police he was able to recount the situation to them.
As soon as he had finished, the one of the policemen removes a pocket Oxford Dictionary from his pocket, and says:
"You should have known to be more careful, mate. Look, it says right here:

PANDA - a large mammal that eats shoots and leaves."

And here is this week's bonus joke.

A guy goes to Australia Post to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Have you been in the service?"
"Yes," he says. "I was in Vietnam for three years."
The interviewer says, "That will give you extra points toward employment" and then asks, "Are you disabled in any way?
The guy says, "Yes 100%...a mortar round exploded near me and blew my testicles off."
The interviewer tells the guy, "OK, I can hire you right now. The hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M. You can start tomorrow. Come in at 10:00 A.M."
The guy is puzzled and says, "If the hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M. then why do you want me to come in at 10:00 A.M.?"
"This is a government job", the interviewer says.
"For the first two hours we stand around scratching our balls...no point in you coming in for that."

Guess Who?

Sorry no prizes here...I'm too cheap.



Noodle you're not allowed to guess this one.

Fridays Photo's

I promised to put the pictures up that were taken on friday but due to everyone's drunk, wobbly hands they came out very blurry

Fortunately (or not) this came out pretty clear. Guess what it is.... The most creative (not the most correct) answer will get a prize at the pub.



This one also came out clearish.

Chicken of the Sea....?

Today saw the welcoming of a new member of the associated campuses of the House Of Chicken - and also to my fish tank. He is an eel-tailed catfish named Henry. Let's all be nice and try to make him welcome.

A Quick Announcement

This Saturday my esteemed business partner and I will be making an appearance at Glebe Markets. If you have a spare moment come down and say hello.

Ricky's Golden Love

Now just to settle with all you doubters that called me a liar.
Take this and this and just for good measure, this as well.

I expect written apologies next thursday.

Creepy Crawlies...you thought Australia was bad.

Last night at the pub we were having a chat about creepy crawlies and I was relaying a story from a friend who recently visited from Japan.

I hate Cockroaches and anything with sticky legs and cream filled bodies....yyyyuuuuuukkkkkkkk!

My friend told me that Australia has nothing on Japan in this arena, apparently the king of creepies lives there and is called a Geji Geji (pron: Ged-gee Ged-gee)

It is like a large centipede with loads of legs and a thick long body. I have searched for pictures on google and found this lovely specimen.


They prefer to live outside in bush-like areas, but are commonly found indoors!

I am very glad we don't have these horrible little blighters here.

Wedding Update

Most of you are up to date with our plans, but I thought I'd blog about them to fill anyone in who doesn't yet know.....

After we got back from Vanuatu and announced our great news we pretty quickly booked our venues and made the date...that was the easy part.

Over the last few months I've been making millions of phone calls, sending loads of emails and generally getting stuck into this massive production. I say massive, but we are actually doing a fairly small one (which is still a massive job) I pity those who attempt what one would call a large wedding!! There just seems to be so many options and so many people to talk to before you make a decision. I'd love to be able to snap my fingers and be impulsive, but my brain knows I won't get another shot at this so I want to do it right!

We headed down to the bridal expo last weekend. OH MY GOSH! I have never seen so many bridal-like things in the one place. We got free tickets from a friend of mine (and one reason for going was to catch up with her) but thousands of people were paying $18 a piece to be hounded by jewellers, photographers, car hirers, florists, dress makers and the like!! Unbelievable!

Anyway, we chatted to a few nice photographers and a jeweller or two and then basically spent our time hunting around for samples of chocolates and cake! our reward for braving the crowds.

We now have an appointment with a lovely photographer next wednesday who is willing to work with us on our terms and not hold us to ransom over our negatives. One of the photographers at the expo actually said that reprints were $8 EACH! and we would get our negatives only after 3 years! The cheek of some people! He then went on to tell us what a good deal it was as the industry standard for reprints was $25 each!

You will notice my excessive use of bold and !!!! but you can imagine my outrage over some of this crap!

Anyway, straight after the bridal expo we headed to the travel expo (again free tix) and actually (after about an hour of standing around) managed to book our honeymoon! WOOHOO!! we are heading off for two exciting weeks to Vietnam! and we got about $300 each off our airfares...that's $600 more for us to spend on accom and fabulous vietnamese stuff! Very excited.

I have also put down a deposit on a dress (I'll go and get fitted and pay some more money in a week or two) and of course I already have my shoes. There is really only the flowers, invites, jewellery/rings and food to arrange (and Flit is doing a beer tasting trip for the reception...he is looking for volunteers...not too hard to find I would guess)

I am not sure if you all know who is in our bridal party...yes we have finally sorted that part too! We have my sister Jane as Matron of Honour, Sarah as Bridesmaid, Nero as Best(worst)man and Mattes as Grooms(messy)man.

Anyway, that about rounds out my plans for the moment. Today actually marks exactly 7 months till the big day so I guess this post is rather timely.

Sorry Mattes if this was too "lifestyle channel" for you.

The Wednesday Dad Joke!

Hi All,

Here's this week's entry for the Wednesday Dad Joke.
Enjoy...!!

This farmer has about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks. So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster that he would sell. The other farmer says, "Yep, I've got this great rooster, named Kenny. He'll service every chicken you got, no problem."

Well, Kenny the rooster costs $3,000, a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Kenny. The farmer takes Kenny home and sets him down in the barnyard, but first he gave the rooster a pep talk. "I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job.!
So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle.!

Kenny seems to understand, so the farmer points toward the hen house and Kenny takes off like a shot. WHAM! Kenny nails every hen in the hen house -three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that, the farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen and, sure enough, Kenny is in there. Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese down by the lake. Once again - WHAM! He gets all the geese. By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants.

The farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't even last 24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next morning to find Kenny on his back out in the middle of the yard, mouth open, tongue hanging out and both feet sticking straight up in the air. Buzzards are circling overhead.

The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive animal, shakes his head and says, "Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself."Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling in the sky and says,

"Shhhh .. they're getting closer."

The NEW New South Welshman

Well, I gosh-darn went an' done it. My licence expires in the next week or so, and today, I got a new one - from NSW! That's right, I'm official now. But don't worry - I won't for a second think that means that anyone will see me for any more than the southern hick that I really are. Yeee-Haw!

Nephew Number 4

This is Johnny (named after you John!), my new nephew (Meg's baby) born on Sat 28th Jan. Unfortunately we probably won't be seeing him in the flesh til end of the year when they come to visit, coz they live in Augusta, Georgia. Isn't he beautiful! That's 3 new nephews in the last 5 months!

Return to Vegas

Well I'm officially a Bachelor Nurse! On Thursday night we had our graduation ceremony back in Brissie of course, and I was accompanied by little Bean (my youngest sister) and the handsome Matthew Starr.




I nearly had an infarct and my systolic bp went through the roof when my photos vanished off the digital camera, but thanks to my good friend at camera house they were resurrected today (along with all the photos that have ever been stored on that card and deleted!) It was Bean's first time on a plane and the first time interstate (except of course for the year 7 Canberra excursion). She was extremely excited about the trip and wanted to take photos out the plane window (like I did the first time). It was odd yet fun doing touristy things with Bean after having lived there for 3 years!

The ceremony was as expected but it was awesome to catch up with everyone, and unlike our science graduation ceremonies all of us new nurses were in the same ceremony together. Matt and I went out with a few friends for a lovely dinner in South Bank afterwards and I managed to leave my testamur at the restaurant (but a poor sweaty waiter managed to catch up with us 200m down the road to retun it!).


Only 2 weeks til I finally start (Feb 20th) in the cardiology ward at Royal North Shore, although I have scored the odd RN shift with the agency doing the enema rounds! I can't wait to know a week in advance when I'll be working, and have a regular income, I'll be a new woman!!!

Homework Task: Report on New Job.

I have been asked to report on the progress of my new position at Tangara.

Things are going fabulously, the girls are very well behaved (but i can see they are about to break out, almost caught girls passing notes today) and they always do what i ask them to do, they are always on the ball and keep me on my toes with the intelligent questions they ask.

Its funny coz each girl likes to put in her two cents in, with a story or example which relates to what we are learning about.....they always know of somebody - a brother, or sister etc which something happened too, so it makes the lesson more interesting and means i have to do less talking and work. Also, the girls are having trouble pronoucing my surname..... they say in a loud strong voice, good morning miss.......(then it drifts off) sammut ?!?.

Its unusual hanging out with my old teachers at lunch time, but some of them, like mrs almedia are so funny, total classics. we chat about funny things my and other classes have done over the years. Its good to see another side to my old teachers, they are more normal than they seemed all those years ago.

Tomorrow, i have 4 practical lessons lined up.....im doing

• fingerprint investigations
• looking at bones, bone marrow and xrays
• tickertape timers
• and probing / cutting a chicken wing to observe the joints, ligaments, tendon's etc.

so im sure there are is going to be many mishaps, messy-inked fingers, cut fingers, squeals, and grossed out students ........ argh the joy's of teaching science.

i will keep you all posted.

Happy Birthday Bryan!

The big 3-0 ! Fancy that!

When in The Czech Republic....hang on a minute!

One would have thought we were in the Czech Republic when one observed the festivities that occurred on Friday night. The long wooden table, the gently falling rain....actually I have no idea what the Czech republic is like so I'll cut the crap.

The SRF headed to Domo, the Czech beer cafe in Paddington. The food and beer were GREAT! Would have been better if we had all been working out in the fields pulling heavy ploughs and planting loads of wheat so as to work up the appropriate appetite for the mountains of food we were served, but we did our best anyway.

Noodle skipped all the fancy pancy salad/green stuff and went straight for a plate of meat (I'm not kidding either!), Evil went for the plate of deep fried brie (more commonly known as heart-attack on a plate) and a number of others had whole chickens battered and deep fried and passed off as a schnitzel!

The beer was GREAT! did I mention that? Especially the rasberry flavoured one, great to start on.

All other beers were of the usual variety (albeit the size of a small swimming pool)

After everyone was well and truly stuffed on beer and meat, we all thought a quiet sit down and small talk would prepare us for our journey home....NOT SO! Two intrepid eaters (read: Sarah and Flit) decided a spot of dessert was in order and asked for the largest, thickest, stodgiest strudel in the world...Little did they know that this strudel was full of cinnamon, so much so in fact that we could smell it from down the table when they spoke!

Ahhh! Good times and classic hits!

ArtExpress 2006

Its that time of year again, when the visual art creations of the class of 2005 are displayed at the art gallery. The exhibit is on from the 4th of feb to the 9th of april. Would anyone be interested in going to check it out?

The website is: http://www.insideartexpress.com.au/

The monotony must continue!

I come to the members of the Stephen Roberts Foundation today for guidance. You see, over the summer I have been laboriously converting my CD collection into the digital format, in order to make full use of the ipod shuffle which Sarah gave me for my birthday (woohoo!). However, even as I type this very line my task is coming to a close, for the last track of the last cd is now being recorded. My quandry is this: I have two days off a week (Tues and Fri) until uni goes back, and I need a new monotonous and time-consuming task to keep me busy....
I'm throwing it open to you: suggestions?

The weekly Dad Joke... Only just on Wednesday!

This week's Dad Joke entries had all the hallmarks that we're looking for... Bad puns, rude bits, innapropriate language.....

Loved 'em all!

But the winner is......


A couple decided to go for a meal and after some deliberation settled for their local Chinese restaurant. They peruse the menu and finally agree to share the chef's special 'Chicken Surprise'. The waiter brings over the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot.
Just as the wife is about to start in on the meal, the lid of the pot rises by a tiny amount and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down.
'Good grief, did you see that?' she asks her husband.
He hasn't so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two beady little eyes looking around before it firmly slams back down. Rather perturbed he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening, and demands an explanation.
'Well sir', says the waiter, 'What did you order?'
'We both chose the same', he replies, 'the Chicken Surprise'
'Oh I do apologise, this is my fault' says the waiter...


'...I've brought you the Peeking duck.'






But this was a very close runner up!

A guy walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His wife is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."