Flupdate: episode 7 - Not long left!

We're now in week 37 of this whole ridiculous thing called pregnancy. I am now considered "full term" which means the baby can come ANYTIME!!!! Basically the longer she stays in, the bigger she gets and the harder my life becomes!

I found out that caffeine has started to really affect her....I had a normal home made coffee and then Jules bought me one from the shops a little later that day and the baby went APE! All day she was going spastic on a caffeine overdose....pretty funny, but I felt sorry for her by about 11pm when she was still buzzing. This morning I had half a coffee and I realised she'd started moving more than usual so my morning cuppa went down the sink to save the poor little thing another day of aerobics. May have to accept the caffeine headache while I switch over to decaf for a while...

The doc finally caved and gave me a prescription for my heartburn! I feel like a totally new person! It's absolutely brilliant not to be scared to eat or drink and to be able to enjoy Christmas lunch without the threat of hours of discomfort and pain to follow. I'm almost starting to enjoy being pregnant now I don't have that heartburn to contend with!!!

Moving is becoming increasingly difficult....especially trying to get out of bed at night and climb over my mountain of pillows to get to the loo...think beached whale and you're almost there! I have taken to waddling around the house, which suits me fine...just have to remember not to walk like that in public! ha!

I've got more energy than I had...I think the heartburn was depressing me. I'm getting out and about and am suprising myself with this new lease on life! There's about 4 weeks left, give or take...I'm praying I go a week early which will mean I get to go to the wedding, but I also get a week out of jail free card!

Merry Christmas to everyone I haven't seen recently! see you all NYE!

Merry Christmas!

George's Christmas Tips!

1. Savour opening your presents, it can be a game all by itself.


2. It's not a real christmas without musical dinosaurs.


3. Keep someone on hand for assembly.


4. Toast is delicious.


Merry Christmas everyone!

Small children are always the scariest

Happy Birthday Noodle

Sorry this message is late - It could have something to do with you posting 95% of the Birthday Messages....

Face book can bite my ass

Join Friend Face now!

f. the cake, give me some wedding cheese.

Mmmmm... Wedding Cheese

Happy Birthday Shari!

May you be thoroughly spoilt!

It's raining baby!

To make it feel just like being there, here's a little run-down of Lady's baby shower. It began on a sunny Sunday afternoon in the quiet refinement of the Tea Room, where the ladies who weren't hungover gathered for a little decorous chatter and elegent refreshment.


Luckily, Gretta's old Merck friend Jo (on her left, above) was there to provide the voice of experience, to regale us with tales of fluids on the loose, openings old and new, needles of mass destruction and social lives loved and lost.

B. Sam brought the wraps. And the accounts of medical marvel, with updates on her new nephews and stories of their parallel journeys to the surface.

Shari had all the right questions to ask a mother-to-be (and I believe, she brought some wraps)

while Jenny and I learned about wraps.

The Tea Room teemed with like-minded gatherings, a lush meadow resplendent with clucking friends and swelling mamas, ripe for the picking by a canny fellow with the right plan.

There were teeny tiny gifts to match the teeny tiny cakes. And wraps aplenty.

We supped on much tea, nibbled on dainty sandwiches and learned A WHOLE LOT about the joys of motherhood.

And Lady was showered with baby.

THE END

Shari.... Don't Go Here!

Scientists in the Mekong Valley have discovered over 1000 new species..... including a cyanide-squirting centipede, a dinner plate-sized spider and a wooly bat.

But don't worry, Shari, it's not in South America.

US Government Reveals "Multiple Kill Vehicle"

This one's for the nerds......

Actor Slashes Neck In Stage Prop Mix-Up

...and this one's just funny.

We have a name!

"gammelfleischparty", or "spoiled meat party", - an unflattering term for a gathering of people over 30.

Thanks to you Youth of Germany - I fell my identity is now defined. All this and a career for David Hasselhoff is there nothing the German can't do?

Lucky Prize Kid

Toddler becomes trapped in toy machine

Flupdate: episode 6 - time to sleep

We're now smack bang in the middle of week 34! This means that if bub decided to come this time next week, the doctors wouldn't try to stop her! She's now approximately 2.1 kgs and about 30 cms long. It's all about the "finishing touches" now - so baby is busy practising sucking, breathing, blinking, head turning, grabbing and stretching out her legs...Boy do we feel that last one! I'm convinced her favourite pasttime is wedging her head into my left pelvic bone and kicking out her legs diagonally to see how many ribs she can push out and how far they'll bend until they break!

Each day I feel like my girth is expanding. My stomach and lungs are getting pushed up higher into my rib cage, so eating and breathing are a little trickier than usual. My old friend heartburn is now pretty much constant...I can't single out individual offenders anymore....it's pretty much everything I eat.
The doctor told me that I'm gonna have a reasonably large baby...no shit sherlock! she had to go to medical school to find that out? I'm also on the hunt for a good acupuncturist for my shoulder, so if anyone knows anyone I'd love to hear about them!

Anyway, maternity leave is awesome! I get to sleep until 10am, which is prefect as I don't sleep much during the night time. I have about 20 pillows propping me up and supporting my tummy...poor Jules doesn't get much space these days. I have time to finish sorting the baby's room (which is actually a lot of fun for me), I get to be a guest at various lunch clubs and meet up with other mums during the day for lunch etc and I'm baking up a storm! If you get the chance to take some Maternity leave I highly recommend it!

I'd love to put more soppy stuff in here to tell you all how excited I am and how I feel I already kind of know this kid, how I'm scared of everything I don't know and how I know that Jules and I will be just fine, but you're all probably just getting back from lunch and would like to keep your meal in your stomach!

Anyway, there is washing to be done and Christmas presents to buy. I may also make it to my aqua aerobics class as well!

SRF EOY Chrissie BBQ

OK peeps, so to recap, the SRF EOY Chrissie BBQ (without the BBQ) bash is this Sunday at Hotel Fricholson, 2pm.

In attendance, we have the following:

Gretta & Flit (famous Flitcroft potato salad)
Nicolai & Mattwa (fresh bread – varietal of their choosing)
Jeff (debut noodle salad)
B Sam (green salad)
John & Shari (reputable Shari cous cous salad)
Sarah & Noodle

Am I missing anyone who may have failed to RSVP in a timely manner?

It is BYO booze. Also, any cheesy Chrissie tunes you might like spun are welcome but not necessarily encouraged...

See you and your kind offering then!

What NOT to do....

Thursday evening, I pulled out my red velvet clutch in preparation for a wedding I was going to on Friday. I noticed some white marks on the side so did a little cleaning and got rid of them thinking my outfit was now complete.

Friday morning rolls around and I opened the clutch to put phone etc in it....the same white stuff was all inside...realising that there was no way I could use this clutch today and thinking that it was either "throw out time" or "take drastic action time"...I opted for the later and threw the whole clutch in the washing machine with some napisan. I then proceeded to forget about it... completely...

Later that afternoon, Jules walks in with handfulls of black matted fabric with threads everywhere and chunks of padding and foam knotted through it...he posed this question to me.."Is this what you intended?" puzzled, I asked him what it was and so he showed me the rest which vaguely resembled a red velvet clutch I once owned! after I finished laughing I thought I'd take some photos to show you all what happens to a handbag that has been through the washing machine, and to warn you if you ever consider doing something simillar what it will end up looking like....I ended up cutting all the lining out of it and pulling the remaining foam etc out so now I could potentially resurrect the clutch for another day.

Friday fun

Music videos re-voiced literally, gah just watch em you'll get the idea...






Thanks to Timmah for pointing these out, truly glorious.
Edit: they seem to have suddenly dropped these but I found a replacement for the first, the second still doesn't work though - damn them!
Edit #2: Hmmm they seem to be back, the wonders of youtube

Happy Black Friday

Black Friday is the day after Thanksgiving which is observed by buying shit.

Throng Of 2,000 Shoppers Bum-Rush L.I. Wal-Mart

Worker, 34, Trampled, Dies; Nassau Cops: Pregnant Woman, 3 Others Injured By Unruly 'Black Friday' Mob

Reporting
Jennifer McLogan

VALLEY STREAM, N.Y. (CBS) ― We're used to seeing scenes like this across the country -- people running, pushing, trying to get their hands on the great bargains. But on Friday – better known as "Black Friday" to millions upon millions of holiday shoppers across the country, a scene like this turned deadly as a mob stampeded over a security guard at a Long Island Wal-Mart.

The heavy glass and steel sliding doors were literally knocked off their hinges in the shopper-stampede-to-be-first. Then the wave of humaity caved in on defenseless Wal-Mart workers as they opened early -- 5 a.m. -- for the annual bargain hunting ritual that kicks off the morning after Thanksgiving.

"The crowd pushed so forcefully that they crashed the doors down and one of the workers from Wal-Mart was pushed to the floor as the crowd entered the store, many of them running," said Det. Lt. Michael Fleming of the Nassau County Police Department.

Cell phone video obtained by CBS 2 HD shows Jdimytai Damour, a 34-year-old part-time employee hired as a holiday temp. He was crushed in the onslaught and pronounced dead an hour later. As responding Nassau police and paramedics tried to save him, they were also jostled and pushed to the ground.

"The man got trampled, stomped on -- everybody banged through the doors," witness Terrence Howard said.

Witness Kimberly Cribbs said all those people who got in went right on shopping after the worker was run over.

"Oh yes, they're savages," Cribbs said.

As 2,000 customers surged ahead, several hundred began cutting the line creating mass chaos. Many bargain-hunters said they watched in horror.

"Pushing in, pounding through the doors to get TVs and electronics," Sean Newman said. "I will never do this again as long as I live. I wish I was never here this morning."

Three other shoppers and a 28-year-old pregnant woman who suffered minor injuries were also taken to hospitals for observation.

"I am happy to report that she did not miscarry and that baby will be okay," Det. Lt. Fleming said.

Eight hours later under police watch the Wal-Mart reopened.

Police have seized surveillance video. Some in the crowd may face criminal charges, amid questions if Wal-Mart's security was adequate as they promoted huge sales.

Wal-Mart issued a statement, which reads: "Our thoughts and prayers are with his family at this difficult time. We are working closely with the Nassau county police as they investigate what occurred."

CBS 2 HD has also heard a report about an incident when the Farmingdale Wal-Mart opened Friday morning. The person involved was not injured.

Planes, Trains and Plantains

This is what I was talking about last night...

Happy Thanksgiving!

Nut Cases Of The World Unite

I don't know why (maybe Edge subscribed for comic value) but i get these e-mails from the "Citizen Electoral Council of Australia" - Fruit Cakes!


LaRouche’s Nov. 22 warning:
The British will attempt to assassinate President-Elect Obama
On November 22 Lyndon LaRouche issued his most emphatic warning to date on the danger of a British-authored assassination of President-elect Barack Obama. Using the occasion of the 45th anniversary of the British-run assassination of President John F. Kennedy, LaRouche warned that the greatest danger of an assassination of the President-elect would be before the scheduled Jan. 20, 2009 inauguration—while George W. Bush is still the President and while Dick Cheney is still in office as his Vice President.

“The most dangerous and devastating thing that could happen to the United States, and, by extension, to the world as a whole, is an assassination of Barack Obama, while George Bush is still occupying the White House. This means that the greatest danger is the period between today and Jan. 20, 2009, when Barack Obama is to be sworn in as the 44th President of the United States,” LaRouche declared.

“The opportunity to create the kind of national emergency, from which American democracy would never re-emerge, is too overwhelming for the British to pass up,” LaRouche emphasised. “Look at the global financial disintegration, which has been underway since July 2007, precisely as I warned in my July 25, 2007 webcast. The Anglo-Dutch liberal system of globalisation, free trade, and unfettered speculation is dead. What the British financial oligarchy fears, under these current conditions, more than anything else is an American revival of the policies last seen during the Presidency of Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Their hatred of FDR almost matches their hatred of Abraham Lincoln. And the British, as the official record even shows, assassinated President Lincoln.”

LaRouche explained, “Lincoln was just reelected to a second term as President, and the British were horrified at the prospects of what Lincoln would do. The British-sponsored Confederacy was defeated, and they hated everything that Lincoln represented, and everything that Lincoln was now in a position to do, with an industrially developed United States, poised to become a continental republic, with the completion of the Trans-Continental Railroad.”

From the earliest days of our republic, LaRouche explained, “the British have assassinated American republican leaders, beginning with the assassination of former Treasury Secretary Alexander Hamilton, at the hands of British East India Company traitorous agent Aaron Burr, continuing with the assassination of President Lincoln, President William McKinley, and President John F. Kennedy, 45 years ago today.

“The British know that an assassination of President-elect Obama, while George Bush is still in power, would tear the United States apart, and lay the basis for the kind of lockdown of the system, that would mean the end—after more than 200 years—of our Constitutional Republic. What happened, under Bush and Cheney, following the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks on New York City and the Pentagon, gives a taste of the kind of top-down repression that Cheney and his puppet George W. Bush would impose, under the conditions of chaos set off by an assassination of the President-elect,” LaRouche explained.

“I consider it the very top national security priority to prevent this British treason. If there is so much as an attempt on the life of the President-elect, as the British media has been promoting it, ever since election day, the whole world shall know the address from which the plot was hatched,” LaRouche concluded.

Flupdate: episode 5 - all knowledged up!

8 week scan - Fluppy is the jellybean shaped thing next to the round yolk sac (which will become the placenta a few weeks after this scan)

20 week scan - Fluppy is too big now to fit all in one screen, so we only get from her tummy up to her head. This is a profile shot. (you can see her right hand is bunched into a fist up near her face)

32 weeks - We're not having anymore scans, so this is really the only way I can photograph fluppy.

So we're in week 32 of this whole shebang and boy am I tired of it! As my girth expands, so does my tiredness and my achiness....yes girls and boys this week it's all about the back ache! I guess the upside is that I took Monday off to get a massage and no one batted an eyelid! sweet!

This Friday is my last day at work and as luck would have it, it's also our work Christmas party, so two birds with one stone works for me.

Saturday (just gone) Jules and I took ourselves across the road to the Hospital to do our "birthing workshop". We had to go the one day option as my doctor led us up the garden path and we missed out on the 7 week course. In hindsight I'm actually quite happy we knocked it over in one day. There was loads of information to absorb, but better than stringing it out for 7 weeks...there's only so many labour videos and knitted uterus' one can take!

Hopefully we're now as prepared as we can be to enter the huge unknown that is having our first baby!

You may also have noticed that I've included Fluppy's portfolio for you all, I'm sure there'll be loads more pictures when she finally arrives but you'll have to make do with these for now.

Btw, Fluppy this week is about 1.7 Kgs and measures about 28cms from head to bum. The doctor told me the other day that Fluppy is now upside down and should remain that way till birth. This is apparently very good as we don't want a breech birth (bum first) and have to have a c-section.

So anyway, come Monday next week I'll be a lady of leisure! Well...as leisurely as a 200Kg woman can be! We're on the home stretch now...only 8 weeks left ARGH!

I can't decide if this is adorable or grotesque. I'm in two minds about it.

A less confusingly named post

It’s not so long away now but I’ve a mountain to climb before I get to glorious ass-end of December when I can wade gently into the summer without a care. My work trips will be over and projects wrapped up in mid December, when I'll be ready to jettison out into the blissful festival of calories and sunshine of Chrissie.

Noodle and I are Christmassing and New Years Eving in Victoria, preceded by the great celebration of the birth of my brother and his brother in-law on the weekend before. I am also mindful of the January that looms – with people running off to do all manner of grown-up things, such as wedding and birthing etc. So I thought it might be nice to regroup and have a bit of an SRF Chrissie celebration once most of the madness has subsided and before we all divert off into family stuff.

(This is what came up when I googled "Christmas Ham"!)

Here is what I propose:

What: EOY SRF BBQ
Where: Hotel Fricholson
When: 2pm, Sunday December 14
Who: Y’all
Why: One last bash for 2008

Let me know if you can make it for catering purposes. It will be BYOB.

NEXT SRF EVENT:

Noodle's End-Of-Degree Drinks!

Come and help me celebrate the end of an era after my very last uni exam! Hurrah!

WHEN: Tuesday 18^th November, 6:00pm-ish (ie. after work for most of you)

WHERE: Gilroy's Hotel, St. Leonards

WHAT: Drinks and/or dinner

Ballet

Ok so this isn't actually ballet but there's some parallels I reckon, my favorite is the loop he does 3 minutes in, oh and the engine noise - which I'm sure Jeremy Clarkson would describe as 'biblical'.

Clever phones

So my clever phone has deleted all my contacts :( So If you have a spare moment can you flick on

phone number(s)
email
Address
Birthday

to my email address ( j[insert last name]@optusnet.com.au )

thanks!

I'll Never Love You More

So some of you from the SRFSS Stacey Lee may have already heard this but if you haven't - enjoy.


If I could figure out how to embed video like a journalist in Kandihar I would, but it remains beyond my ability.

Flupdate: episode 4 - Beached as bro!

Week 29! only 12 weeks left! I remember when I was 12 weeks with 29 left! How quickly has it gone? This week fluppy is 26 cm long and weighs a whopping 1.15kgs. Both of us are just packing on the weight now, fluppy needs to double in size before the birth and knowing my luck so will I!

My heartburn seems to have taken a slight break. It now starts at 8.15am (I can set my watch by it!) but it is at least responding to medication again, what a relief. Thought I was coming down with my 6th cold of the pregnancy on Friday, but by Sunday I felt much better and have returned to just a low level of achiness and congestion. Joy!

I'm getting really excited about meeting this little person. She kicks me hourly just to let me know she's getting stronger and that "it's not long now Mum!" such a weird thing to think this little person will call me Mum!

Can't stand work any longer, just going through the motions, but my brain has checked out. Only 5 weeks left at this desk! Just as well since I feel enormous and can really sympathise with that cartoon whale..."I'm beached as bro" everytime I try to get off the sofa!

My Work Fairwell (THIS FRIDAY)

For anyone that wants to tag along...

From Geoff:

After 8 long hard years of struggling, the time has come to bid a proper farewell to our lil’ Johnnie who has succumbed to the evil temptations of better working conditions, more money and less responsibility. (Yeah right, he basically got fired but to allow him to save face we all had to pretend he quit).

As a memory of his legacy we must raise our glasses and have a toast or a roast to his honour on Friday, November 7th where he will be welcomed into the club of those who’ve left before him. Thanks to our gracious host, Mr. Daniel (I am like Fish) Stevenson. Map to the house below and BYOB. Please pass this on to anyone who we might have missed.

MAP = http://tinyurl.com/6b5oxv

Next Challenge

OK Team - next sporting challenge laid down is the Bondi to Bronte Ocean Swim

A mere 2.2 - 2.5 KM paddle from Bondi Beach to Bronte Beach, can you think of a better way to spend a Sunday Morning?

Just click here to register!

Bring it on!

On Spicks & Specks tonight

Adam, Myf and Alan are joined by Mia Dyson, Ian 'Dicko' Dickson, Des Bishop and Heath Franklin.

ABC

8:30pm

It's a little colder today

After wading through the history of the Victorian gold rush era (skipping a whole chapter entitled "The Second Parliament", after failing to find the glee in "The First Parliament") I was inclined toward more of a lightweight trifling distraction for my train reading. So picked up ‘White Elephants and Red Herrings’ which is basically a chatty stroll through some common idioms and their origins in the English language.

This morning I relished the nautical chapter. I am a sucker for the habits and superstitions necessitated by the harsh and precarious way of life that brought Europe to the rest of the world (where she imposed herself quite savagely, for the most part.) Anywho, before I detour into controversial territory, I thought I’d share this little nugget as for some reason, reading it made me think of Mattwa. Which is weird, because everyone knows that Evil is our cabin boy.

Freeze the balls off a brass monkey
The gunpowder for the guns on 18th century man-of-war ships was stored centrally and ‘powder monkeys’ (young agile boys) were engaged to fetch the powder and cannonballls from storage to the guns. The cannonballs were stacked and moved around on brass trays with 16 convex indentations that prevented the stack from rolling away. These trays became known as ‘brass monkeys’. On really cold days, the brass would contract, the balls would not sit properly in them and roll all over the place. Hence, the freezing of the balls off the brass monkey.

Flupdate: episode 3 - We have a nursery!

And week 27 rolls around.... this means about 13 weeks left! and in my head about 6 weeks left of work till I escape, enormous and puffy, to float in Balmoral's cool cool waters......

Fluppy is now about 24 cms long (just to clarify, the measurements I am giving you in cms is from head to bum....legs not included...not sure why, it just seems to be how they do it) and 920gms.

It's all about the weight gain and getting more surfactant in the lungs to help breathing in the outside world. Fluppy has been practising his breathing, but it isn't regular yet, so he needs to keep working on that. His kicking is at Beckham standard, so we're getting the contracts ready for him to sign when he arrives!

This weekend we (I really mean "I") spent an enjoyable few days getting the nursery kick started. We have a fully assembled cot in one corner with a beautiful glider (very comfy rocking/gliding chair) next to it, a fully set up change table with glorious Margaret original painting hanging above it to add a splash of colour. Bassinette and pram sitting in opposite corner ready to go and some fun baby prints hanging over the cot to make the room look loved.

Most of the beer has been put away and the while the weights bench lurks in the hallway, it too will need to one day move back into the nursery till the big day arrives and baby kicks it back to the curb where it belongs!

so for now, enjoy your chocolate, as that's my latest loss, and hopefully one day you will be able to feel the phantom kicking (if you want to, and if Baby allows....sorry John)

Sooooo

As it turns out, Peta's ex-flat mate Amy's fiance Chris' friend is already borrowing Chris' bike and last night's alcohol inspried solution to the Getting to the Gong Crisis '08 fell through.

SO I GOT A NEW BIKE!

And she's blue! And quite quick.

We cut a fine figure, Jemima and me, standing in the driveway. (Even though she's a boy bike, Noodle insists I be riding a girl - i think she might be a transvestite. But don't mention it in front of "her". I think she's sensitive.)

So Noodle and I just went for my first bike ride in about 14 years and it turns out
THAT IT IS REALLY REALLY FUN! Did you know that?! It can be a little bit like FLYING!

But now I'm tired so I'm going to watch a DVD.

The end.

Deans Birthday!

So it's little Deans Birthday this Saturday, so it's time for

That's right LAN Party!!!

We can have it Grandma's like these people:

Or a Dean's new flat:

Ask him for details of when/where at the pub tonight.

Happy Birthday Lady!

Hope you and the Fluppy have a corker... With UNBELIEVABLY straight hair!

TDK

Thought I would share these pics from back home with fans of The Dark Knight, which was filmed in Chicago during the summer of '07 I believe.

This first one is looking east on the Chicago River as it heads to lake Michigan. Marina Towers, the corncob looking buildings, were visible in several scenes. The black building which they're obscuring is the IBM tower, which served as Bruce's office and apartment during the movie. The almost finished Trump Tower poking over the top was the set of the final hostage/fight scene with the joke. Towards the bottom rights, the rectangular silver building is Hotel 71. The ballroom on top was the set of the Harvey Dent fundraiser.





This one's looking down Lasalle street, Chicago's version of Wall Street. This was the set of the police procession.




















The glass and silver building is my office back home at the corner of Wacker and Monroe. In the middle of the street is the ramp, which the batmobile used, going down to Lower Wacker, the scene of the underground chase.

Anyway, besides being a good movie, TDK was fun for me to point out all the local sights I passed on a daily basis. The filmakers left in just about all the business signs and didn't edit out much at all. Maybe the Matrix was like that for you all, I still haven't watched it again since coming to Sydney.

Fantastic Contraption

I found this very simple yet very addictive flash game through a podcast yesterday. It's a physics puzzle where you have to create contraptions out of wheels and rods to move items from the build area to the goal area.

Starts very simple, gets complex pretty fast although they all have multiple solutions.

The game is called Fantastic Contraption, check it out I think you'll like it.

Here are some of my contraptions: Mission to Mars and Four Balls

And lastly, the Friday Flashback

Holy crap were we busy bloggers three years ago today.

Friday Frippery

At the onion. For some fun-yn.

Sunday Fabulousness

So nothing to do this Sunday?

How about Yum Cha



Followed by a stroll through Hyde Park, past St Marys on to the Domain then to the Art Gallery of NSW to see the Monet exhibition.




Then is the Day remains fine as forecasted continue the stroll around Mrs Macquires Chair, Botanical Gardens, Opera House and Circular Quay.

You know you want to!

Flupdate: episode 2 - Burnin' down the house!

So Saturday ended week 24 for the Fluppy and myself - it worried me slightly to realise there were only 16 weeks left till a screaming, naked ball of Flitcroft fury entered this world via... well...me.

This week I have mostly been suffering from heartburn!

The list of food and drinks I am able to consume is slowly decreasing as each week passes. This last week I have lost:

• soda water
• white wine
  
• certain salad dressings
  
• cuuuuurrrryyyyy! (well a full curry at least, if I eat very slowly and only eat mild ones then I am ok...for now)

Apparently this will continue as Fluppy grows and continues to squish my internal organs up! so life continues on with it's little challenges....

We now however have bought a pram and today I ebayed ourselves a lovely new bassinette! very chuffed!

Fluppy is about 22.5 cm long and weighs about 720gms. Fluppy could survive outside if born today (fingers and legs crossed THAT doesn't happen!) Pretty much all her systems are formed and functioning, from now on it's all about the weight gain...Oh Joy!

She's still kicking away happily and Jules has had a few chances to feel the karate going on in my tummy. Usually she starts kicking just as I'm drifting off to sleep or in the middle of important work phone calls and catches me off guard...I guess it goes to show what kind of a child we'll have later in life.

Other than all this, it's getting harder to bend in half and anything with shoe laces fills me with dread. I should probably make a list of things to look forward to when the baby comes, such as putting on my jeans without having to have a rest half way through!

Very Modern

So I am really trying to get my head around this working environment. My Boss walks in at lunch and announces that since Monday is a Public Holiday everyone should finish at 4pm.

He is managing a Cinema Company and doesn't want to crush his staff - I don't get it...

Narky Sarky Wednesday

or
Why I Can't Join Mattwa on the Wagon

Because my ongoing project for today is an assignment report for Hong Kong, which I would normally really enjoy but am finding very dull probably because I'm looking at a 4 day weekend, I am diversifying my usual methods of procrastination with a cranky burst of bile.

We have a very dull, poo-brown product which we only sell to the Australian public sector. The transaction is always made with a sniveling little public servant who considers themselves to be a highly important customer because we overcharge so much for the product that it’s probably the biggest thing in their puny little budget. It also happens to be the smallest thing on my pricelist and lowest scorer of care factor. (Is my haughty self important tone coming through yet? Do I even have to type out how much I feel I am above this menial task?) The product itself is FRAUGHT with DISASTER and makes my fingers BLEED whenever I have to even type the name of it, thanks to our good friends at DFAT and their association with this product. And sadly, now that Michelle is gone, I AM THE ONLY ONE LEFT to handle this itchy little piece of business, at least until Marina Manson starts on Oct 22.

A call comes through this morning from, um, let’s call her Rebecca C, because that is her name and she can tell it to you with the greatest of competence, explaining quite importantly that she needs me to send her one of these urgently. Today. I tell her to calm down (I don’t actually say to her “calm down” because that would be rude, but it is definitely implied in my patronising tone), give me her email address and I will send her the subscription form and details and blah blah blah. She does, I do, and it is rejected by her system for one reason or another. Let the 20 minute phone call commence in which I have to hover over my inbox awaiting an incoming from her that she tries to send over and over again, this time for sure, now is it working, I must have it now, no she doesn't want a fax, haven't I got it yet…. Then after ONE MORE TIME reading out my email address, it seems she doesn’t believe in hyphens in email addresses and has been persisting with a fullstop instead. Replying to her email still does not stop mine from getting rejected by her system.

So I finally get the form to her by fax, she faxes it back, then emails me to tell me it has been faxed back. Then, 20 minutes later, as I studiously ignore her fax sitting under my right elbow, another call from Rebecca to double check that I have received her fax. Which I have, I tell her. But as she failed to send in the second page, I am not sure what country she wants this for. If she tells me on the phone, I will jot it onto the front page of her fax ready for when I benevolently action it, in many hours, when I get a free minute. She wants South Africa but she will fax it to me anyway. She does. And emails me to confirm that she has sent page two, confirming that she wants South Africa, as notified by phone. When I do not reply to the last email, she phones again to confirm that I received the confirmation email regarding the fax confirming what she told me on the phone – that she wants South Africa. Using as few words as possible while still technically speaking English, I confirm receipt of all things related to this shitty little purchase.

The fax then gets moved over to the farthest most point on my desk, because I have had 1 too many dullards on the phone today and I make myself feel better about it by being petty and more ridiculous than the perpetrator of said dullardery. I mean, doesn’t this woman understand that I have a lot of important, big profit work today that I need to shirk with blog posting and facebooking and emails about lunch club?

Until the last phone call. From Rebecca. Asking me to confirm if she will indeed get the product by COB today. And with that last master stoke of brilliance, my will to fight buckles under me, my resistance tumbles away like a house of cards and the burocrat has bested me. In one last fastidious, i-dotting t-crossing transmission, Rebecca C from the NSW Department of Incompetence and Fuck-uppery has unwittingly worn me down. I can’t get that damned fax off my desk fast enough.

Hopefully she’ll pay her invoice one Aussie dollar at a time, by a series of ambiguously labeled direct deposits and faxed remittance advices with scan-and-email-back receipt confirmations.

Happy October

31 days left to lodge your tax returns!

SRF Event

What: Casual spring BBQ
When: This Public Holiday Monday!
Time: 2pm
Where: HOC
Bring: Your own booze and allocation of food as advised
Why: No particular reason, just spring, public holiday, JENNY & ALEX ARE BACK!!!!